Have you ever had a calling that tests every fiber of your being? I have. Right now, actually. I feel so much guilt saying this but it's the first time I've thought about asking to be released.
I'm in Activity Days. It is the hardest calling I can remember having. Including the time I taught in Relief Society. I know. Hard to believe, right? I have such a hard time with those girls and they scare me. I can't believe I'm intimidated by 8-11 year old girls. It sounds ridiculous, as I type those words. There have been a couple times, at activities, where I have just wanted to say, "Sit down and shut-up! You should know better. Your not three years old." Sometimes, that's what they act like. Do you think I'm a horrible person yet? 'Cause I kind of feel like one.
But I can't ask to be released. Partly because of guilt and partly because I feel like there's a reason I should be there. I don't know of many people who get a calling they want. Most of the time, I think we feel inadequate when called to positions, but that's where the Lord comes in. I have to keep praying for patience and love. These are his daughters and He loves and cares about them.
I'm so proud of you for still hanging in. I thought you would ask to be released months ago!
ReplyDeleteGospel according to Tawnya: I do feel there are callings that are heaven sent. I also think there are callings where they just needed a body and nothing (bad feeling wise) was standing in their way. If you have prayed about it and felt - without a doubt - that is where you should be, that is one thing. If you haven't, maybe you are in the "body holder" set and release isn't that bad. I don't think asking to be released should cause as much anxiety as it sometimes does. Esp. if done out of much soul searching and prayer.
Hey, I'm in Activity Days too! But I just have the 10-11 yr girls. Sometimes I think they are like kindergarteners....I have a hard time when we do crafts because of the (what I think is) silly way they do things, even though it's only because they aren't like me, or have moms like me (lucky them!). Hang in there until whatever needs to happen, does :)
ReplyDeleteI have 1 word that will make you feel better about your calling.......Cubmaster! :)
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